Monday, December 12, 2005

Dew me

On my last day at JMA, Joe so kindly presented me with 48 24oz Mt. Dews as a parting gift. For those of you who don’t know, I’ve had a long and sordid affair with the Dew for many years. It all started in college when I had to pull frequent all nighters. At the time, I didn’t care for coffee so my beverage of choice became Dew. We, of course, had a soda machine in our studio building but at $.75 a can a college kid couldn’t get very far so instead I usually opted to make a run to the grocery store to pick up a couple 2-liter bottles at about $1.00 apiece. Total bargain, over 300g or sugar and enough caffeine to make your hair fall out. So with that logic in tow, I paved the way for a serious Dew addiction and one that I have been half heatedly trying to kick for a few years. Over the last few weeks at JMA, I had been slowly weaning myself off of the sauce hoping to be done for good by the time I started working in Boothbay. Joe, being the great friend that he is, decided to go with the “give a recovering alcoholic a 12-pack and the keys to your car” route and set me up with a two month supply of the arch nemesis. Just last week I consumed the final urine colored beverage and am now once again trying to get the monkey off my back. Joe, my headaches thank you.

The last dew. Parting is such sweet (and I mean teeth falling out sweet) sorrow.

3 comments:

Hawaii Dano said...

It is good to know that a study suggests "Mountain Dew has been known to shrink your balls." and that you will not have to shrink yours anymore. With you next kid you may need them! :) lol Rick!

rick is! said...

I wanted to mention the nads thing myself but with the recent booby backlash I decided to play it safe for a while. I figure the dew came in handy. If my boys were still full size we may have had twins.

Joe said...

Happy to help. Hey, you wanna hit the convenience store this weekend and pick up a few 2 liters? We'll carry them around in brown paper bags, walk the streets and see what happens.