How to be a good dad.
By: Rick Nelson (future father of the year)
Change diapers frequently.
Pretend not to be mortified when you get poop on your finger while changing diapers.
Similarly, when you taste her baby food, pretend its delicious and not at all bland and styrofoam-e-ish.
Laugh at her when she does her cute little pouty cry.
Scold her so that you can see her pouty cry again!
Look on with amusement as she eats bread crumbs off of the floor that were left by the dog. (My how the tables have turned here!)
Post silly pictures and stupid stories about her on the internet for the whole world, ah, make that a handful of people to see.
Make fun of the size of her head (its gi-normous by the way).
Finally manage to take care of my crap and to finally, for the love of god and all that is holy, remember to close the damn basement door!