Mission Accomplished

Phew, the baby will be here any day now and we finally, finally finished the baby's room! It was getting a bit close. I had anticipated it taking a few weeks to complete. Those few weeks turned into a few months. It also ended up costing three times what we had originally estimated. I think that I may have a future as a contractor with how good I am at estimating time and costs on a job. Overall I think that it came out quite well considering I have the carpentry and electrical skills of a drunk circus monkey. Anyway, here it is. I hope that she likes it because its the nicest room in the house now.

Now all that is left to do is sit and wait patiently for Brynna's arrival.

We're almost there

The big day is quickly approaching and we can't wait! The baby has finally dropped so maybe that is a sign the she'll be arriving soon. I'm frantically trying to finish the baby's room as we speak putting on some of the finishing touches. I screwed up the light switch when I first installed it so last night I had to cut out a chunk of my newly drywalled and painted wall! That sucked but I think that I've got it under control now and will be able to re-tape and paint over the next couple of days. Overall the room is looking pretty nice. I think that we may have gone a bit overboard since it looks like it was ripped right out of a pottery barn catalog but you only get one chance to spoil your first child right?

Censors strike again!

Oopsie, apparently I have done it again. The censors feel that my use of the f-bomb is a bit out of character for me and that I was just using it to be cool or sumpin. But I'm here to tell you that I know that no matter how hard I try, I will never truly be cool. So if I use f-this and f-that it is as a sentence enhancer only. In the future I will try to curb my enthusiasm and save the f-bomb for when it can truly be appreciated.

My g-rated joke of the day:


Golfing Preacher
There was a preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance that he could get, hecould be found on the golf course swinging away.
On one particular Sunday it turned out to be a picture perfect day for golfing. The sun was shining, the temperature was just right and there was very little wind. The preacher was in a quandary and wasn't sure what to do....play golf or give the Sunday service. The urge to play golf overcame him and he called in his assistant to take care of the Sunday service for him. The preacher packed up his car and drove 3 hours to a course where no one would recognize him.
An angel above was watching the preacher and was quite perturbed. The angel went to God and said, "look at the preacher. He should punished for what he is doing." God nodded in agreement.
All alone but enjoying it immensely, the preacher teed up on the first hole. He swung at the ball and hit a perfect drive. The ball ripped through the still air straight as an arrow and 400 yards later it landed the green where it gently rolled into the cup. A tremendous hole in one!
The preacher was amazed and excited. The angel was in shock. The angel turned to God and said, "Begging your pardon, but I thought that you were going to punish him?"
God smiled and said, "I did....think about it....who can he tell about this?

The g jokes are getting better.

Are we there yet?

Well, Marcy and I are patiently awaiting the arrival or Brynna. Yeah, f-that! We're getting damn impatient! It seems like everybody around us is having their babies. Kevin and Tina had theirs last week, Jen and Tom had theirs on Monday and Kevin's sister had her twins yesterday and we expect Dena's to come shooting out any day now. Wait, whats that sound? It sounds like cubicle Joe is having his right now...oh wait, maybe he just had mexican for dinner last night.








Joe about to give birth to a brown baby boy.






Anyway, I know that we technically have two weeks left and we'll probably be begging for this baby free time in a month or so but we're ready now damnit! As a result, we're doing everything that we can to coax that little sucker out of there. If you don't already know what some of those methods are, trust me you don't want to hear it here.

I guess I've been crude enough for one post. Later

(I apologize to any coworkers who were harmed in the making of this post)

White lightning

http://www.chariotcarriers.com/html_english/home.htm

Check out Brynna's new transportation. I'm hoping that she loves it cause she'll be spending a pant load of time in this sucker plus it'll cost almost as much as a house payment once we get all of the attachments. This was its maiden voyage and I managed to run over a pile-o-dog-poo that Chance had thoughtfully provided. Thanks buddy.

As a side note, how is it possible that summer is almost over and I'm still lily white?

The grass is always greener...

Marcy and I stopped in at Subway last night to grab a couple of sandwiches for dinner. We had taken the pets to the vet after work and didn't have the energy or time to cook dinner so we were slumming it. Anyway, I got a 6" something-or-other and Marcy got a 12" something-else-or-other so that she'd have half left over for work today. We get home, marcy grabs half of her sandwich and I grab mine and we plop down in front of the idiot box. As we always do (or she always does and I usually forget) we each try a bite of each other's sandwich. After trying both I decide that I like her sandwich better than mine. Oh well, isn't that always the case. A few minutes later Marcy glances at my sandwich and says "are you eating my sandwich?". Of course I'm not right? Didn't I just try both and inform her that hers was better? Well upon further inspection, I was in fact eating the other half of her sandwich! What a dumb-ass. I'm still thinking that her half of that particular sandwich did in fact taste better.

The Big 3-0

Hey everybody guess who turned 30 last week! Thats right, my Marcy hit the milestone so I'm no longer the old man of the house. We got together with family and a few friends at a restaurant in town. It was a beautiful, sunny day on the river.

In other news, we went to the doc's again last night and everything is on schedule as far as the baby goes. We've still got two weeks before the actual due date but we may try to speed things up. I feel that we've been getting too much sleep recently so a new baby in the house should solve that.

yup 

Onsie wonders.

Marcy had her official baby shower last weekend and a suprise shower at work a few days prior and all that I can say is "wow, thats a shyteload of onsies". Frickin a, this kid already has more clothes than I do. I think that something happens to a woman's brain when somebody that she knows is having a baby. Somehow all sense of reason is shut off when the shopping begins. I think that one friend gave us something like 15 onsies and full outfits! Pretty cool though. I don't think that we'll need to buy clothes for about 10 years.

Weebles wobble but they don't fall down (hopefully) 

lets keep this "G" rated

Ok, so Marcy warned me the other day that I may want to watch what I put on this blog since hundreds upon thousands, uhh, no, lets make that a handful of people check it out when they have nothing else to do at work. Therefore, I should be careful what I write about. For example, I drew and amazingly funny sketch of the whole "doggie style gurney" (see previous post) that I wanted to add to the story. Unfortunately (for me and probably fortunate for everybody else) Marcy intervened and I didn't post it so as not offend anyone. It seems that some people don't understand my "humor" all of the time. I put "humor" in quotes because it is actually very subjective after all. What one person finds funny can be quite vulgar to another. Hmmm, whoda thunk it? I could talk about poop and boogers all day and have a hell of a time.

So anyway, here is my "G" rated joke of the day:

What did the zero say to the eight?...drumroll please...Nice belt!

Tee hee, that was f-in funny.
Damn censors.